Saying Goodbye
by oh hay psy
Summary: A short vignette from when Remus was five. Charlotte Lupin says goodbye to her son.


A/N~ AHAHAHA ph33r me, I actually FINISHED a fic! -dances- A short vignette from when Remus' was five. ^^ Enjoy  
  
"By the time you swear you're his,   
  
Shivering and sighing,   
  
And he vows his passion is   
  
Infinite, undying -   
  
Lady, make a note of this:   
  
One of you is lying."  
  
-Dorothy Parker, 1893-1967, US writer  
  
Charlotte Marie Lupin had always been a patient woman. A long-suffering woman. A woman who could take large hurdles easily in stride, still keeping her head held high and her lips sealed tight.  
  
But there was only so much even Charlotte could stand.  
  
She'd known a long time ago about Jacob's infidelity. No one had to tell her. When he came home too late at night, she smelled the unfamiliar perfume on him, she saw the slight make-up smudges on his collar, she caught him stumbling over his lies. Jacob had never been a good liar. When they were first dating, she knew there was something odd about him. He hadn't been able to keep the fact that he was a wizard a secret from the muggle woman for long.  
  
Jacob was, quite literally, from another world. And he had showed her that world, that fantasy reality, where magic was real. She'd been amazed by the Charms and Transfiguration and Potions he showed her and told her of. He'd swept her off her feet, a young girl in her early twenties, mesmerized by this young sorcerer. She'd married him.  
  
And she realized that, aside from the wand, wizard men were no different from muggle men.  
  
Jacob was by no means a bad man. Quite the contrary. But he was a human, and had plenty of faults. But rushing into marriage, she'd been rather blind to them. But she loved him, nonetheless–thank god she hadn't been stuck with some wanker. She'd gotten lucky in her mistakes.  
  
But there was only so much she could take.  
  
She was tired of it. Tired of how he wouldn't meet her eyes. Tired of his muttered excuses when he came home.  
  
Well, she wouldn't have to stand it much longer.  
  
Charlotte didn't know who the other woman was. She didn't want to know. She didn't want to be able to put a face or name to the woman who'd stolen her husband from her.  
  
She glanced up from her book as Jacob began folding up his copy of the Evening Prophet. He stood and walked back towards their bedroom, murmuring a quick "Night, Lottie." She gave a slight smile and a nod of acknowledgment–not that he saw it. She continued to pretend to read until she heard the bedroom door click shut.  
  
Moving slowly, she closed her book and set it on the end table. This was it. Tonight she was leaving. She had her case packed, waiting in the hall closet. Charlotte had been debating with herself about this for over a month now. She'd finally gotten her resolve to do it. She was now coming to the hardest part.  
  
Saying goodbye.  
  
Standing, Charlotte headed down the hallway, pausing at the first door on the right. Careful to be quiet, she opened the door and stepped in, shutting it after her. It was obviously a child's room, gauging by the toys and picture books on the shelf. The five year old boy was currently asleep, buried under his thick comforter–only his light brown hair was visible. Charlotte smiled softly to herself. He always did get cold.  
  
She kneeled beside his bed, brown gaze fixed on her son. Her little boy. Her Remus.  
  
Pain and guilt wracked her heart as he turned over in his sleep onto his back, mouth slightly open. His frail little body, already more scarred than any child's should ever be. He already had so much to deal with... Now losing a mother? Tears shone in the corners of her eyes as she brushed his cheek with her finger tips.   
  
No. She quickly stood. If she cried now, she'd never go. Brushing away Remus' bangs, she planted a gentle lingering kiss on his forehead. "Goodbye, Remus. I love you..." Slowly, she walked out of the room backwards. If this was going to be the last time she ever saw her son, she wanted to treasure every last second. Her back hit the door. Still watching Remus, she opened it and stepped out into the hallway.  
  
As she closed the door, Charlotte felt the urge to run back in there and hold Remus tightly, never letting go. But no.. Charlotte had always prided herself on her self-control–though she feared it might fail her now. She closed her eyes, fighting back tears. She had considered taking Remus with her at first, but quickly decided against it. It wouldn't be fair to Remus... Jacob might have been a lousy husband, but he was a good father. Not to mention Charlotte had no idea where she was going. She didn't know if she'd have a place for him to stay during a full moon...  
  
Charlotte felt horribly selfish for leaving him like this. But for once, she was tired of taking the backseat in her own life. It was time for her to do something for herself. Taking a deep breath, she opened her eyes, sucked up her guilt, and walked down the hall. She paused momentarily outside the bedroom she and Jacob shared; very light snores told her he was asleep. Good. She opened the hall closet and took out her coat and put it on. She then grabbed her suitcase and headed out the door.  
  
She never looked back. Later that night, when she checked into a hotel room, she cried herself to sleep.  
  
Charlotte Marie Lupin had always been a patient woman. But she never had been good at staying to deal with problems.  
  
A/N~ W00t! feedback would be most loved. -hearts to everyone- 


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